Auld Lang Syne

     "Should Auld Acquaintance Be Forgot, And Never Brought To Mind. Should Auld Acquaintance Be Forgot, And Auld Lang Syne."  A simple Scottish poem set to music that has become the epitome of a New Years song. I looked it up and it means "Old Long Ago". Makes sense to think on whats gone before us in the year that's leaving, also to remember those perhaps no longer with us. "We'll take a cup O' Kindness Yet for Auld Lang Syne", so we raise our glasses at midnight and give each other hugs and kisses and good wishes for the year that's coming.  As I get older I can see how New Years Eve has changed for me. What once was an excuse for a huge fun time with lots of drinking and drugs, (yes mainly pot, but some others made there way in back then), is now a time of reflection and self growth. That does not mean that I don't enjoy a good party, I most certainly do and always will, but if I don't go to any I am not bummed. This year hubs and I were invited out to what would have been a great night. Some friends have this huge hooka and we all were going to partake and have some drinks, and laughs, but since I am still not 100% I am staying in tonight. I just finished my last treatment IV for 2012. LOL I figure if this is how the year is starting it's just going to get better. It's only half ten here, yet a few of my friends have already seen the New Year in, I love watching the clock chime in all the time zones, seeing the year coming across the globe. New start, like a rebirth of sorts. 
     Unfortunately this last IV dose has given way to tummy issues as it often does so this will be shorter than I thought it would be, and plus me jabbering on does nothing to cure a hangover, so I want to leave you with this sentiment I found online. It was written by an Englishman named Neil Gaiman, it goes as follows:
May your coming year be filled with magic, and dreams, and good madness,
I hope you read some fine books, and kiss someone who thinks you are wonderful, 
And don't forget to make some art - write or draw or build or sing or live as only YOU can, And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.
     Hopefully you will have lots of surprises in 2013, and cross off items on your bucket lists and don't forget to play as well as work. Know that you deserve to be treated with love and kindness and that it's not bad to win but when you lose to do it gracefully and to learn from it. There is so much to do and we never know when the clock will stop, so live as fully as possible. I wish you all peace and a Very Happy New Year.  

New Years Eve

     So here it is, it's almost half 6 on New Year's Eve day!  I have been up since 5. The allergy to my meds is slow to subside. I took 3 benedryl capsules yet I still itch , and on my hands yet!!!! I tell you this, I have an entirely brand new respect for hubs, and can now understand the torment he goes through with his skin allergy. It's so much worse than what I have, and I just can't imagine how he deals with it!
      December 31st, it's cold here, but no snow, and what we did get the other day did not stay around for long. I love the snow. When I was younger we used to go snowmobiling! What a rush it was. I think I'm going to look into it as soon as my infection heals. I have no idea what it costs now!
I am spending the eve very quietly, just me and hubs. Oh a couple we know invited us over for a New Years Hooka party, but I am not really up for that. Took a rain check though! Lol
     I will be back later but I wanted to wish you guys who are hours and even a day ahead of me a very  Hsppy AND Healthy New Year!!ciao for now

Normal, not me NEVER! LOL

     Well as you all know I had a long hospital stay, drove myself, and friends nuts with my self pity, but now is the time to look towards a new year with lots of possibilities and new adventures to have. 
Yes a Happy AND Healthy 2013!! 
      I have to tell you all just how odd things get sometimes, here's the scenario. I have a 104 fever, hubs takes me to the hospital, they decide to admit me and the man who comes down to tell me about HIPAA laws, (privacy acts) which I know, since due to my job I am HIPAA certified! Well this guy says something to my husband that I didn't quite get. Hubs answers him and I realize he spoke Japanese to mu hubby. Now as a side note, let me state that hubs is teaching himself Japanese, through books and anime (yep anime). It is half his heritage. Up until this point I hadn't realized how much he has learned in so short a time. This guy and my husband talked in Japanese for about 10 minutes straight. This man had lived in Japan for 15 years and spoke it fluently, and except for a few words, hubs was doing really well. I was impressed to say the least. Figures it happened, was kind of funny really. 
     Well I am a week out of the hospital and my leg is a weird burnt color and peeling like crazy. It's still warmer than they would like. I mean what the hell bacteria got into me??! But I do have to say I am getting better, as I am noticing I can sleep better. The only thing is that my IV meds make me nauseated and I have to rest after each treatment so I don't YAK! I have an appointment next Thursday with the doctor and I'm asking all of you to cross your fingers that they will take me off the IV. I don't care if I have to take pills and stay out of work (although I'm on FMLA unpaid leave) as long as I can get back to being untethered from this damn pole.  I said I wanted to be a pole dancer but this in not what I had in mind. LOL
     You know, it's interesting, I called my Dad today as it's his 85th birthday. He asked me if I was sure everything was okay, as he thought I wasn't as exuberant about Christmas as I usually am. Very astute I must say, Dad doesn't miss much at all. I assured him all is well but i know what you are thinking. Why not tell him. The reason is simple, he doesn't handle bad news well. In a way we are the same in that he feels helpless and it frustrates him, I do the same thing. As I have become an adult I see many of his traits in myself - skeery!!! :-D
     I still have gifts to wrap and send out overseas. I am hoping to get to them this week if I am able to venture out. I want them to have the prezzies. I also want to get to NY to see my friends there and give them their things too. I know they are fine with it and I am too, just that I love giving things. I got some surprise gifts this year that I did not expect. I am so touched that these friends sent me these lovely things. I was so absorbed with the thought that no one misses me at work, and I didn't matter that I got super needy. But thank you gals for all you sent, for my owl earrings, lovely French chocolates and for my tea for one Royal Albert in Moonlight Roses, a favorite pattern I have mentioned. Those and the bad jokes & calls from my friend "Across The Pond" made me realize that I am thought about and loved and I love you all back guys.  MUAH!! Big wet sloppy ones for all of you!HAHAHAHA Yep it's all going to be fine and better!!
    Well I'm off to watch the Christmas special of Dr. Who.  geek that I am :-D    So I will say ciao for now

Don't Be So Rash

     Unfortunately I can't help it as my medicine has done just that. It's giving me a lovely blotchy red rash on my legs, hands and chest. I was thinking about my hubs and the itching he does and while speaking with a friend today he mentioned the same thing.  It's terrible but I have my benedryl so I'm dealing with it. 
    The days are all melting into one as when you don't do anything it's just passing hours. This to me is the hardest thing to deal with. Oh sure I love a lazy day, one where you have no work or no plans, but when that's the constant even days like that get so fookin' boring. I would so much prefer to be doing things so that when I veg out it's because I'm tired from things I've done. I did venture out for Christmas to go to my in-laws and even though it was wonderful to see them, it made me so tired. I was very surprised at how taxing just showering was. I wrapped my arm in a plastic bag so I wouldn't get the PICC line wet and the water felt so good just falling on me that I didn't want to get out. I washed my hair and used the last of my Molten Brown on my body and it made the bathroom, (and me lol), smell so good.
     Today was a phone day as about 5 people called in a row. I loved it. I would love to Skype more, I facetimed with a friend last night who just got an Iphone5 and never had done it before. We laughed so hard, she is like a sister to me. She had the best story that I must share, she put it on Facebook so I don't think she would mind, her son (age 7) had used her peppermint body wash to take his shower and when he had come downstairs he announced that his penie smelled like a candy cane!!  BWahahaha, you have to love kids and the things they come out with!! :-D 
     I have a Dr. appointment next Thursday so hopefully they will take out the PICC line and let me go back to being untethered and then back to work!!  I miss working, I do like what I do :-) 
     Well I really am boring right now so I won't keep that going and bore you all also so here is where I will say, as always, Ciao For Now
    

Chrsitmastime Is Here

     Well since the world did not end, (Did anyone really think it would?), here I sit. None the worse for wear really. I have my PICC line in, my antibiotics administered 2x a day, and truthfully energy levels at an all time low but I am here. I admit this infection was bad, worse than I thought it would end up being and of course my stubborn system is resilient to most antibiotics so they had to change the "blend" 3x before they came upon this one. So as I assimilate back into normality I find myself so behind in Christmas preparation. I was ahead of the game, I had 96% of my gifts bought and in hand the week after Thanksgiving. It was smooth sailing, and then...DA DA DUM!!!!! just under 2 weeks in hospital pushed it all back. I had apologized to those I felt so bad about not getting their cards and gifts to in time as all had the same response. "Shut up, don't be daft!!" LOL  They are right of course, but years of holiday shows and movies put these images in our heads. Of course everyone putting up pics of their decorations make me a bit jealous in a Martha Stewart kind of way. I want to show my tree and all the neat ornaments and retro balls that I would be hanging on it. I finally can say I am now resolved that this is NOT HAPPENING!! Not this year anyway. So I will send out the prezzies when I can, and those receiving them know that I love them and wish them nothing but all the best. At least I got my dad's cards done, whew!!! That in and of itself is a Christmas miracle.
     Ironically enough, everyone was like oh you will be out for Chrimbo, not realizing that I celebrate the Winter Solstice or Yule if you will. I arrived home that very night actually and as the hubs lay sleeping, and I was enjoying a cup of tea, I looked over at the lamp in the corner of the room. Hubs had bought Christmas lights and strung them around the lamp as a surprise for me. I could have cried, it touched me deeply. This, I realized is the whole thing in reader's digest version. The feeling that I felt looking at those lights, hearing him snore gently, and to be back home was as much a celebration as if I had done a Yule alter to pay homage to the Holly King. I did silently offer prayers of thanks to him and to the old Gods to guide us through the night and to herald the coming of longer days and to when the earth will once again be reborn in the Spring. This too is Christmas, for those who believe, a new birth to bring life back to the world. Nature is my religion, feelings inside guide me. I am so grateful to the ones I love. My family and friends mean so much, and if I dote on the fact that things are not there in time it's just that I want them to have what I got for them. I will see my in-laws on Christmas day and that is fabulous. I will call my dad and have a nice chat. I told him next year he's coming to us for the holidays, he just says "we'll see".  LMAO
      I did miss my office party but what are you going to do? I will be out of work until at least the 1st week of the new year then it's up to the dr.s to see if I can go back to work. They are just scared that if I go back to soon I may relapse. My hubs wants me like the boy in the plastic bubble. He is so afraid of me being near any germs. I told him that to remove all germs is not possible and I mean I have almost 3 weeks worth of antibiotics in me right now, not temping fate at all, but that's a lot of antibiotics, so I should be fine. 
     I had a dream one night in hospital and I had gone to sleep kind of pity parting myself (BIG surprise lol) about not being able to prepare for Christmas. In my dream was both my Mom and my Nona. My mother told me that is okay and all would be fine and not to worry. I remember waking up from that dream with tears on my face. See Mom and Nona were my nucleus in regards to Chrimbo. We would stay up all night cooking, and baking. We would light a bayberry candle that burned in the sink all night. We would drink spiked egg nog and just laugh and yell too but that was all good. 3 generations of women each telling each other what they are not doing right. HAHAHA So much food for a lot of family coming to eat Christmas diner. New Christmas corsages on our coats. It is engraved in my mind and how great that I can relive those time over and over. They are both gone now but I always think of them the most this time of year and its a gift that I open every year with relish!!
     If I keep going I am going to turn into a soppy sausage and start sprouting how I love all my friends so much and want to be with all of them and hug and kiss them and just feel them, flesh & blood in my arms. So before I do that ;-) I am going to wish you all a very Merry Christmas. Enjoy yourselves and the love of family and friends and in the spirit of the season I am not signing off with my usual, but I will copy from one of the best Christmas stories ever and channel my inner Tiny Tim and say "God Bless Us All, Everyone"

Too Much Pity Time On My Hands

     There was a song in the 80's with that title by a band named Styx, I dug it back then and it makes sense to me right now. This is DAY TEN!!! 10 that I am in the hospital. I look around my room and I smile at the little pink teddy bear my hubs gave me, yes a small child's toy but there were a few nights I held that poppet very tightly. 
     WHAT I'M ABOUT TO SAY DOES NOT INCLUDE THOSE OF YOU WHO DID CALL, AND KEEP IN TOUCH (SOME EVERY DAY) YOU ALL KEPT ME GOING WITH YOUR JOKES, AND SKYPE AND JUST HEARING YOUR VOICES. SO THANK YOU HUBBY, MELISSA, MATT, MATT'S TRIBE, TRISH AND LESLEY.
     I don't know what it is about me? Do I have a "boy who cried wolf" air about me? or am I just a drama queen that when something like this happens people don't take it seriously? I had (have)a really really really serious infection, I ran 103.8 fevers for 4 days. Had to up the intensity of my antibiotics too, I got nothing but texts from work not one phone call. I know they miss me (I hope so LOL) but texts are so cold. I got not one card either, they are all close to the hospital, would have been nice. Didn't even get flowers from them. Just the obligatory ones my company sends out but nothing personal. Not that they are expected but I guess if it was a reverse situation I would have had blooms and a card sent out their way in a heartbeat. But I will see them Christmas hopefully as they always have us over which is appreciated. There is the issue I think. I guess since I can go overboard I think others will a bit too. Just because I am on facebook as a major diversion to boredom and pain does not mean I am not ill. Most times I was on but not on. 
     I guess I just had a hard slap to let me know I am not that important in the grand scheme of the earth. It hurt. I don't expect 24/7 undivided attention but a call or card would be nice, not like this was an overnight gig. I still don't know when I'm getting out of here. I can tell you I have a PICC line now. They put it into me yesterday afternoon. It goes in your upper arm and around your heart to the big vein that's right above it. I have it because when I leave here I will still be on IV medicine. Pills are not strong enough. I am on morphine for pain and I have no clue what they will be sending me home with for pain. I don't know what I mean.  I read what I wrote and it sounds like I'm a big baby who appreciates nothing yet that's not what I'm trying to say. I love my friends so much and I guess in my mind I see things so NOT reality. I live in Mary world I guess and lately its been very lonely here and I just need a fuckin hug. (poor hubs I hang onto his hand when he has to go at night, I hate watching him go home, then of course I call him 10 minutes later once he's home) I just one needy bitch at the moment and I'm sorry but I can't help it!!
     If this offended anyone I didn't mean to and I love all my friends as much as I ever have but they take my blood pressure every 4 hours here and I need to vent so it doesn't go too high  :-D

Still Here

     Bit weak at the moment, but I wanted to stop by and say hi. One because I know some of you come here all the time and I want to have something. Other is I need this to keep my pressure down. I have been here for 4 days now. I actually got a text today from my manager - one line - how R U?  Told her about my fevers and cell counts and sent pictures and I got back "OUCH poor Mary.   No when are you coming back or what are they doing for you. 2 people commented on my page and these are new people not those I know for years, my co worker who I sit side by side with and have for 4 years.  I know people have lives and its holiday time so I guess I'm just being a big fuckin baby. I know it feels like I'm whining but I am not really. I guess I expect things I shouldn't but I'm just going by past experiences.
    To those who have been there. I say bless. You help me through my day with calls and emails. In going to be here at least a few more days so keep em coming lol
Hubs has been running around doing it all and he's been wiping tears, helping wash, and even fed me grapes. Wonderful :-).
Just bored guys but ill stop and be better tomorrow. So ciao for now

Look a NEW Post

     So here I sit in the hospital, yes feeling a little lonely, I got some flowers from work which was nice but every time I text to talk I get no response. I don't get it? Even hubs thought it was a bit odd that by today they aren't enquiring as to what's wrong? Thing is we don't know. All they know us that this is not fixed by a z-PAC , it needs to be administered intravenously. As a matter of fact they changed one of the drugs today as they aren't getting the results they really want. Good news is my white cell count is down to 17k but my leg is twice the size of my other one. It's hot too! My fever has gone down -yay but then just now it was up to 102.4
I don't know what to think, is this where I actually start to be really concerned ? I'm trying to make light of this whole thing but down inside I feel like a little kid who just wants to be held and told its gonna be okay. One friend sent me a bunch of cheesy jokes and they were much needed.
I have no clue when I'm getting out of here, it may not be until next week it could be Friday who knows. Hubs brought me some lovely flowers tonight, they make the room seem brighter not that much can be done to make this look better. Lol
I also called my dad to tell him I wasn't coming up this weekend - a treat and a half let me tell you. :-)
So I wanted to check in in case you wondered where I was. I'm in a hospital bed on the 5th floor - one weird thing that was kind of funny.  For no reason Monday night my left nipple hurt like hell. I'm talking serious pain, I got a shot of morpheine - it got a lot better pretty quickly. Haha. If only it was always that easy. Right? I'm sure I'll be fine but I wish it would hurry up!
Bit sleepy so ill say ciao for now.

A Cup Of Tea For Me

     So it's Sunday night and I am watching Miracle On 34th Street and am very content. I have my tea next to me (Earl Gray) and all my cards are done, and I've even wrapped some prezzies! Interesting weekend as I got to hang with some folks last night and found the delights of kissed caramel vodka. Was very yummy, and I even had some hits off the pipe last night. I can say I truly enjoyed the night. I was barely on the usual social networks all weekend but when I was I left a bunch of pics and thoughts that I hope people like or can relate to. Thing is, I like them so it's all good. 
     I bought some sweaters and of course tomorrow it's going to be warm! I tell ya it's the way I roll man. It's the bring an umbrella with you and it won't rain syndrome. LMAO I was out by my in-laws also yesterday so I stopped over to give our sponsor money to my brother in law, as my nephew was participating in an event to raise money for the mission he is going on in the summer. Yes a mission. I have no clue. My hubs and brother are not overly religious and we know I'm a witch (but open and sympathetic to all religions) so its odd to hear this. Yet I like it, shows that my nephew is developing a sense of community, as well as a sense of caring and helping others. Good for him. He is a good kid, as is my niece, I mean they are kids and get in trouble as all kids do, but they are good hearted and that matters so much. Kudos to bro and wife for raising them that way. 
    I mentioned tea in my title and well, of course I am having my nightly mug or cuppa one could say ;-)  Tea just appeals to me. You can have it iced if you are warm and of course with or without milk, my preference is with milk. That's how I always had it with my Mom. Growing up my mom and my Nona and I would have a cup of tea and some cookies every day. Mom would ask about school, as she readied dinner for later when Dad got home. How bourgeoisie can you be? LOL It was wonderful and every time I drink  a cup I get this feeling that I'm re-connected to her somehow. She passed her love of tea to me. Oh sure I enjoy a good cup of coffee very much, but something about tea touches your soul. It's the ritual I think. Even at work, even with teabags, I still fill my mug with hot water and let that warm my mug then empty it put in the teabag then add more hot water. I do have some loose tea, I would like more! I like strong tea so I often leave my teabag in my cup until it's empty. I can go through at least 6 cups in a day at work. That first sip calms me then I'm good to go! There is a tea service that one day I would love to own. I mean I would love some funky tea kettles and love the artsy look but as for bone china my choice is a pattern no longer produced. It's by Royal Albert called Moonlight Rose. It's just gorgeous. The rose pattern is in subtle hues of blue and lavender. They have another pattern that is SO popular over here in America called Country Rose, but I much prefer the former. It's different. I can see it in an antique Welsh cabinet in my dining room, hahaha. I read too much Jane Austin :-)
     Speaking of reading....I read that many classic books such as Catcher In The Rye and To Kill A mockingbird are not going to be allowed in school any longer. This upsets me greatly. Mockingbird is still one of my favorite books (and movie) it teaches humanity and treating people as people and not by how they look. I mean will they take out Animal Farm, or Lord of The Flies, The Bell Jar or any of the other great books that may contain non pc writings but teach so much and open your mind to thought and question. Books are meant to make you wonder and dream, and question. They can make you cry or get angry and it's a wonderful thing. As a matter of fact, I came across some of my old books from when I was about the ages of 9 - 12. I am sending a couple over to my friend's daughters as add ons to Chrimbo gifties. I hope they don't think I'm total nuts but I loved these books and I have no children to share them with. The stories are good and I have no clue if they will seem stupid and simple by todays children's standards. I have one for my nephew as well. Reading is important to me since as an only child I found my friends in the people in these books. I took their adventures along with them. Okay I go overboard maybe but I think you get what I mean. I hope they like them too :-) 
     I am still not eating much but maybe with my new work schedule as of tomorrow I can at least have dinner at a reasonable time. I'll be 9 - 6 now much better. As I write that I glanced at the clock and it's almost 11PM so I am signing off to try and sleep. I only slept about 4 hours last night, was up until almost 6AM my time then I must have fell out as next thing I see it was just after 10AM, so I'm trying to catch a few extra winks.  I will say then as always, Ciao For Now

Here I Sit, Here I Ponder

    I am sitting here at my desk at work on a very quiet evening. Phones are not ringing and this is one reason that next week our helpdesk will be changing it's hours to 8AM - 6PM. This has caused me to review my resume as well, as one never knows what the new year will bring. I don't plan on going anywhere but I will be ready should I be needing to take that trip. I mean we will be okay as hubs has a good job but it's nice having the extra income and not having to worry. So here I sit eating one jelly belly vanilla jelly bean at a time until I finish my allotted 10. As I ponder life as we know it.
    I ponder often and think the weirdest shit sometimes, some I even share on here as those of you who have read faithfully know. My soapbox has indents from where my feet have firmly stood while my knees shook as I spoke my thoughts out loud on paper (der?? LOL)
    Hey guess who I spoke to??? JOANN!! My weight loss pal. She is the same she said and she also told me she is hanging on to her weight loss of a total of 28 pounds. I am so thrilled for her, she tries so hard. She wants to break the 440 mark but can't seem to get there, and she said of course Christmas is a hard time. We spoke and I told her of my little tricks I'm doing to keep the weight off during this time of year, and since she is hosting the parties it will not be as easy for her. So we discussed things like making the smaller single pies so not as much left over. Also I told her keep the meats and veg and give away more meat and veg and ALL the carb goodness that I know she is making. But you know what? She can keep or give away whatever she wants, its up to her, as hell I know I will not be an angel, especially since we are having our holiday get together at work in 2 weeks. I mean I will not go crazy, but I know me, a cookie or several will pass my lips but it wont be an entire trayfull :-) Im going to enjoy celebrating but I now realize there is one thing I will stay away from. No not cake or pie or potatoes or biscuits, the one thing I will stay away from (even the low fat version) is going to be EGGNOG! God I LOVE THE STUFF. I have made eggnog custard pie, cheesecake, poundcake but not this year. It is bane to me this year. It's just empty calories, lovely delicious empty calories, and then add the rum to it and (oh god I'm getting all twitchy here) it's just a gift from the heavens!! Rich, creamy, sweet, and the smell is divine. Yea I kind of like the stuff, can ya tell? lmao
     Ahem, getting back to Joann. She has a new man in her life. She says he is funny and kind and he likes her even at her size. I told her she is a lovely woman so stop that "at her size" crap. I know gals who are the society "Normal" size who are complete biatches who no man or woman would want to be near. Size has nothing to do with it and if i am to be totally honest in my feelings, being a bigger gal all my life I feel has helped me develp a more caring personality, that people like and enjoy, at least I hope so:-)   No I'm not fishing but feel free to agree BWAHAHAHA
Oh do you remember the coat I gave her, it still didn't fit but she took it to a tailor who gusseted the back and she is wearing now that the weather is colder. Glad it went to good use. I seem to have this thing for buying wrong sizes over the internet. LOL
   Well peeps I've not really pondered at all but I am sitting ;-) . I must do a few things before close of business so I am saying, as always, Ciao For Now

That Kind Of Night

     Guys I am not feeling writing tonight, I don't feel bad but it's been a hectic day and had to deal with some issues that just take things out of you so I am not really writing my blog tonight. Catch up on some you may have missed or even better, leave some comments. I have some new countries that joined and all of you, I would love to hear from you, your thoughts or things you would like to see me write about.     
     I did have a sexual blog written, but I deleted it. Some things you don't want to say too much for fear you will jinx it.  OKAY FINE (I hear you asking lol)  I will give you two of the lines from it BUT THAT'S ALL  hehehe ;-)
1) I want to be all you desire, although I know I am lacking in certain ways, yet you never make me feel as though I am
2) I want to do everything you want to do to me, or want me to do to you. Anything your mind has always desired & dreamed of doing, tell me your deepest inner thoughts!

There ya go, yea I guess it's THAT kind of night.  LMAO
So until next time peeps, as always Ciao For Now

Witching Hour

     Hello again and hope everyone is good! I'm jumping right in and just commenting that my leg is swollen! It's the same leg (right one) that hurts in my hip and butt since I took that fall last week plus it's like the feeling is lessened on my calf area. I'm in a odd way and yes I called the dr about it and going to see him. I mean lets face it folks, when I fall, regardless if how funny it can be, I am not 50 pounds hitting the floor, not even twice that so gravity is not kind in this respect. Where most may pick up, dust off and carry on, I take a little longer to recoup!
     Well tonight I was driving home and the DJ was talking about how every snowflake is different in all the millions of snowflakes and that so are we. Exsestential (spelled wrong)aside that's just cool as fuck!! Not one duplicate, how fabulous is nature ? I mean no one else has your finger print. It is yours unique to you. I like that and in a world where we mimic so we fit in its nice to be reminded that we were made to stand out. I try to do this, I try to be my own woman so to speak. I like to think I have a unique view in things, that my answers are not so contrived that folks can plot out my moves for me. A woman of mystery lol but then again I pretty much wear my heart on my sleeve so maybe it's not contrived at all, more that I am an open book so you can see what's coming. Be your own person - thrive in your uniqueness.
     Short and sweet tonight guys, just like me. Lol
So I am saying goodnight this gal is tired. Ciao For Now all

Food For Thought

    I am determined to get through this Christmas/New Years season with out a ton of weight gain. I would like to get through it with actually losing weight and I believe I can.  Two reasons really. One is partly becasue i am not sure what had gotten into me but I am simply not hungry!! This has been going on for almost 2 weeks. I feel hungry then I get a grilled chicken salad or even a turkey sandwich, I start to eat it and find myself left with at least half that I figure I will eat later. Later comes and I don't eat it. Yet I'm not looking for anything else to eat. It is odd but I'm not forcing it. Someone already said to me that I'm walking around the office better than he has seen in awhile, and it's true, even with my muscle pain (which I am seeing the Dr. for tomorrow)  The other reason is portion control. Since we are going to my in-laws for Christmas brunch it will be easy to limit myself to a couple of eggs or a small sandwich with lots of veggies to go with it. It will not be a dinner meal. So dinner is up to us and it will be meat and veggies. I will splurge on one thing!! I am making a mince pie for us. Hubs and I are the only ones who like mince pies, we like fruitcake too actually lol) so I am making two individual smaller pies. Portions right if there is a full size 9inch pie we will eat it since no one else likes it. I have been known to throw away things too but it is wasteful so the small pies make sense. 
   I also am baking all my cookies at my Dad's house when I visit on the 15th. This way I can leave a lot there, then pack up the ones for work and the ones for gifties for my managers. Hubs doesn't eat chocolate so I promised him I'd save a few pignoli cookies out for him. (An italian Christmas favorite, those and my rainbow cookies) Now those are dangerous. Very time consuming but soooooo yummy.  They are made with almond paste and apricot jam and if you want the recipe just let me know I will post it. They are supposed to be red, white and green to resemle the Italian flag, but I like to add yellow to the 3rd layer so they kind of look like I'm celebrating the Jamaican bobsled team  COOL RUNNINGS MAN!!  LOL   Here is a pic of them

You would want the entire pan but they are rich! I love baking, and I like to make nice cookies for work this time of year. Hubs brings in some of my goodies to his job too usually.       My desk is decorated too now. I put my tree up and you can still see the cards my friend's daughters made me last year :-0

    I am having an unofficial race with my manager to see who gets more boxes delivered. So far its close but I'm a few ahead LOL Either way the gal bringing our packages is play bitchin' at me, she is awesome too!! Well all it's getting close to that time. I need to visit the little supervisors room and then close my systems down, next week this time we will be closing at 6PM, actually home in time to cook dinner LOL So I will say Ciao For Now

Another Weekend Come and Gone

     Hey all, here we are on another Sunday evening. It's been a quiet day, filled with Christmas cards and music to write them buy. I am done now except for my handmade ones. I have about 6 of them to make left, as 2 are done. I had to send out a message to friends on FB to get the addresses of several people, since I once again have misplaced my address book. I know I know, why is it not on my computer? Well it is but the video card on it is dead and hubs hasn't fixed it yet so I am without the addresses PLUS some have moved since last year. I have them all back though and I'm putting them in my phone. I know some by heart I will say. LOL
     Well let's go back to the origins of this blog, my losing weight. I got on the scale this afternoon and to my surprise I have lost almost 8 pounds in a week and a half. Awesome right? More odd as I have not been purposely trying to lose anything. I find myself not hungry really. Oh the thought of all the goodies that happen at holiday time sound very tempting but the actuality of the ingesting doesn't  appeal to me. I am very thirsty though, and have many cups of tea at work, and ice water is always in my tumbler on  my desk at work. I have bruises still from my fall and my thigh is hurting. I can't explain it, it's like an ever present charlie horse. Like the muscles are twisted and when I stretch my leg I feel them pull. Of course with all my back pains and aches lately the attempt to the gym last month petered out and I have not gone. I have though started doing very beginner yoga. Someone told me about it, and gave me the beginner DVD. It's a lot of isometrics, and its not a lot of lower body moves yet which is good since I'm still having pain there. I have a doctor appointment on Tuesday to get some meds to help with the pain, you know, happy pills HAHAHA  Otherwise I am okay. Just that there is a lot of stress going on right now, but as always it's something I must handle, and handle I will. This weekend was good so I am optimistic. As others are going to the doctor also, thank the stars!!! :-D
     I want to do something charitable this year. More so than normal. I'm talking like actually handing out gifts or food to those who have nothing this year. I am not rich by any means , but I have a home and clothes and a car and thankfully, at least for now, a job. It just seems right, KWIM?  I need to go to Target also in the next few days to get some toys for the Marine Corps "Toys For Tots" it's a good cause and it's right in the office lobby LOL
    Getting back to the weight loss. I think I will continue this yoga and as I get stronger I will do more of it and take the classes at my gym. I kind of like it but I am cautious of the ones where they have you kneel on your elbows and things like that. Hell I am a human weeble and I doubt I could even do that. If I did I can pretty much figure I will roll out of the room as no way I can bend like that. Although I have been known to bend in odd positions through out my life and even liked them !! hehehe  I'm so naughty.  What? Like this is news? ;-D 
    Well peeps, I am going to take a long hot bubble bath methinks, then some tea then bed! Tomorrow is another full week of work (the slave drivers LMAO) So as always,  Ciao For Now

Saturday Morning - A Posting We Will Go

     Hey Peeps, surprise it's Saturday morning!! Yep about 10:15AM my time and I am settling in for the day. I know! Sounds pathetic right but not really. I was out early and got my grocery shopping done, all my Christmas gifts are bought. I have my blank Christmas cards at the ready to write out and I have a stuffed up nose like nobody's business. So I think I will spend this day addressing the cards, listening to Christmas music and wrapping gifts.  Thing is, I am ahead of the game BUT I am waiting for gifts I ordered to be delivered so until they get here, the ones that I got for overseas can't be shipped. They should all be here in the next week and a half (I hope!) LOL  I am a dork though, I got something for someone over in Europe that plugs in and then after talking with hubs, was made to realize that the outlets are not the same....D'OH!! So now I need to get an adapter, Radio Shack here I come! :-D It's things like that, that I have been known to overlook on occasion. It's a cool prezzie for a youngin' and he must have it!! hahaha
     It's been a crazy few days and I had posted on here the other day but I took it down as I thought it may have been too much. Had some issues and well it's hard guys. I try to do my best and pony up to the bar but at times, I too have moments of major weakness.  I had a sit down and hopefully things will get better, we shall see. I know, rather cryptic, as I'm not saying what it is, but just suffice in that I will get through it! 
     I am going into work tomorrow, NO not to work, but to decorate my desk for Christmas. I LOVE doing that. We already have the office tree up, and my manager's desk is all done. I have my groovy silver tree from last year, with it's big red balls!! That's right!! Hey, at least they are not blue ;-D  {giggle snort} Plus we have a walk through for some people on Monday to show off the helpdesk. 
For those of you who do not know what that is, well basically I work in HR. My company has offices all over the USA and Europe and Asia. My department is ground zero for their benefits, employee relations issues, etc. So we are here to answer all the questions these 70K + employees have. I am one of the supervisors, so when someone is upset or angry, well that's when I get the calls transferred to me. On a basic day, it's quite fine. My reps may need help, and I answer them so they can pass this information on to the person on the phone BUT this last month we had Open Enrollment. This is when the employees elect their health benefits for the coming year. This one was bonkers. On an average day we answered 1600 calls inside of a 8am to 8pm day. That's a lot of calls! :-D They rocked it, good team, and now that it's died down we will be planning our holiday pot luck. A time to relax, play music, and bring in lots and lots of food to share. Not sure what I'm making this year. I'll maybe bake this time, perhaps a cheesecake, or something I've always wanted to try....... a Victoria Sponge. It looks yummers, and judging from the ingredients should be delicious. Don't we all just try to culinary impress at Christmastime? :-)
      Well off to get my cards sorted, and put the kettle on for a nice hot cup of tea. It's 39 degrees Fahrenheit but feels like 33 it says, at almost 11 in the morning, brrrr! lol  So I will say Ciao For Now
    

Wow - You Never Know When I'll Post Lol

     It's 2:45am my time and I'm having trouble sleeping. Lets see how to put this. Okay - ever see a house that was on fire in the dead if winter after the firemen have been there. It's odd because all the water has frozen so it actually looks kind of pretty! Like an ice sculpture, yet underneath its tragic.  My thoughts tonight as I drifted off to sleep were the same way!  I am perfectly happy, sans my bruises which are already faded, I'm looking forward to Christnas, planning my trip, in-laws and hubby are good, and yet under all this pretty sculpture is the sad part. I know of several people not very well at all. Was speaking with my manager, who's own Aunt is quite ill with cancer, only to find out that a co- worker is very very sick with Mersa. She has battled this on and off for the last 6 months or so, and now it's in her bloodstream! Very bad!! It can be deadly at this point and I am do very saddened st this. It's like the powers that be need to throw in negative do you appreciate the positive I suppose but it sucks! I gazed up at the moon last night ( She was beautiful and full in the sky) and asked that these people get well or find peace or both! I know it's all part if life but we don't have to like it all - right?
     Well lets switch gears here, lighten up a bit. Haha. I have no clue if anyone has won the huge powerball lottery, it was a crazy amount too, something like 500 million! Oh can you imagine!!!??  Who knows, maybe hubs and I win some cash as I bought ten tickets. I'm sure I didn't win big but a little extra $$ would be nice, wouldn't it?  Well peeps its just after 3 am and I just had a quick glass of iced tea, which all but promises that I will be up again in a few hours to pee, yet again!!! Bwahaha. Cold weather + lots if tea + getting A LITTLE older = waking up during the night! :-D I know I'm a goofy bunny! So until we meet again I say Ciao For Now.

A RARE afternoon post

     Well peeps, I made in into work a half hour later than I normally would have due to the fact that I wrestled with an air conditioner this mornign and lost. LOL Its a stand alone model that was in the corner of our bedroom, so when I got out of bed this morning some how I tripped and reached out in front of me to steady myself and well, didn't work, do I did a faceplant right on it, as it and I went toppling over. Its just over 3 ft tall so it's only 2 ft shorter than me LOL My hip is black & blue and hubs will have to pick up the air conditioner as I can't lift it.  I called my manager to explain what happened and I started laughing as I did, as it is just so absurd and so purely me!!
     Well it's business as usual today for us here and I am on my normal schedule for the time being. As of December 10th we start the new schedules, so I will then be working from 9 - 6. At least i can cook when I get home and we can eat at a normal fairly normal time. I only wok 10 minutes from my home (nice I know LOL)
    More gifties have arrived today and I LOVE IT!! I love buying presents for people. Many of my friends and I will actually go out to have a nice dinner and get together when I go to NY but for those I don't see, well the gifties arrive. I have already set up deliveries to them (EEEEEEEE <-----happy squeal lol)  
    Okay my grilled chicken salad has arrived so I am going to indulge. Bidding you all Ciao For Now  (May be back, never can be sure hehehe)

A Full Work Week - Horrors!!!!

     Well today starts an full 5 day work week, how will we cope? LOL It just seems so much harder coming back when you have had some time off.
      I just keep trudging through but i will tell you I have re-vamped my resume and am about to repost it on Linked In and a few other sites, as work has been going through some changes. I just heard someone will no longer be here after this coming Friday, but it it what it is, I suppose. Just sucks big time when it's around the holidays.  I also feel a bit blue due to the fact that today I brought notice of an employee not doing their job, and he will be let go and as much as it needed to be done, I still feel bad for the same above reason. He was spoken to and warned and still continued to do just what brought on the talks so we had no choice. It's part of management that I am still not used to. Oh I do it, I reprimand when needed (always as nicely, but sternly as I can) I guide and help as much as I can, still I feel like a ghost at times. I feel like in a ghost in lots of ways tonight actually. 
     I'm am so happy though,  as the gifts I ordered started coming in today. I found something that was mentioned almost a year ago and I finally tracked it down and got it. I love when that works out and it's not even the main gift, just a fun something meant only to give smiles :-D
    Peeps I'm going to go, I have work to do and I'm not in a trying mood. I'm actually in a quiet kind of mood, yes mark those calanders as this may not happen for a long time again, so I'll be back tomorrow night. Ciao For Now

Let The Holidays Begin

     It's almost midnight and I find myself wide awake. My mind is very active at the moment. I've been my usual crazy nutter to friends these last few weeks but it's me. I try to curb it and mean no harm and my friends know I love them, hell I say it ad nasuem LOL I am talking about other kinds of active thoughts. 
     I had an offer to do a photo shoot for someone who is on another site, he is a legit photographer, but as we talked more it became evident that besides the pin up, and glamour shots that I had in mind, he on the other had more erotic shots in mind. Look I am no prude, heavens know this, but I prefer to have those shots for special eyes, not a photographer I met online. One that no one else I speak with has ever been photographed by even. Erotic is okay too but he was discussing more than erotic and I don't think he would have pushed the issue but it was not comfortable for me. I especially don't think that hubs would approve that type of pic. I also need to get back on track as I am a bit ashamed of myself for letting my aches and pains be an excuse for me to not move more. I have about 9 months to be very mobile as it is then I will be on a plane headed to England. I have already been told I will be walking a lot and I promised to be able to keep up and I mean to keep that promise. I am happy to report that even with the girls weekend, my scale once again has moved in the proper direction. We made it through Thanksgiving with minimum bad calories. Bro made a delicious turkey, I had a little stuffing and green bean casserole, cranberry jelly, butternut squash and they made the sweet potatoes just cut and seasoned and roasted, they were lovely and not laden down with sugar and marshmallows as they often can be if you look at all the recipes. Did give in to the weakness of pumpkin pie, but its gone and no more has been bought and or made. We stayed quite awhile at the in-laws and had a great time. 
     My thoughts have been on holiday shopping and I have accomplished my goal almost 100% I even have all the gifts I need to ship out ordered, just need to wait for everything to arrive. Bought myself a new casual coat as well, as I needed a new one. Got myself that and new snow boots. Wanted Timberlands but i had to watch the pennies so I got a nice off brand that will work just fine. I used discount codes and all in all did quite well money wise. Of course my hubby is the hardest for me to get for. He doesn't wear jewelry, nor scent (skin to sensitive) and he loves computers. All that adds up to me having a hard time to buy anything other than small things like tee shirts or little knick knacks for the office, which he likes a lot but it's not the only thing I want to get him, know what I mean? 
     I also have charities in my mind this year more than others. There are some I donate to all the time, like breast cancer and ASPCA (for animals) but this year with Hurricane Sandy hitting NY/NJ so badly it really brought home what is important. I am donating to several places in the actual areas hit, I am donating to food pantries and the like. They are saying clothes are being donated but they need things like toiletries and diapers. So I am going to the drugstore tomorrow and buying the staples that we all have but you don't think about. Toothbrushes, toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo, canned foods, brushes, if you think about it some people lost their entire homes, and stupid things like those aren't that silly when you don't have them. Diapers will also be bought to donate. I see that as things get back to normal it's easy to forget that for many it still isn't it. 
     Also the year is winding down and soon it will be a new beginning yet again, no matter what those Mayans say LOL Another year that I can say I did not nearly enough and that makes me sad and frustrated. I only have myself to blame for that but I dream of a year when at the last day, the day I cross off Dec. 31st in red on the calender I can think back and say I have accomplished all I set out for for the year. Has anyone ever done that? I don't mean unrealistic New Year's resolutions either. If you have I would be very curious to hear about it. To my friends that I pester left and right, have I done all I could have by you. have I been a good friend or did I lack in some things? You know we never see things as others do and I guess I need some validation of sorts. No I'm not feeling needy LOL I want to learn if I'm in error anywhere so I do not repeat it. 
     I got all my dad's Christmas cards written out, he's getting on in years and when my Mother died I kind of took over the job for him. I don't mind as I put on Christmas music, have a drink (or two hehe) and write them out. Next weekend I must make mine. I have finally decided what I'm going to do and since today was Small Shopping Saturday (not buying in huge stores but local stores to support local small businesses) I went to my stamping store and bought paper and embellishments and glitter, etc. so I am all ready to assemble, cut, and watercolor my cards :-D 
    Well peeps it's half midnight and I am going to finish my drink (hot buttered rum - my third lol) and go to sleep, so until next time Ciao for Now

Simple Thanksgiving Musings

     We still vaguely hear mention of pilgrims coming over to a new world. They sought freedom to practice their puritanical rituals, to build new lives for themselves. They barely made it through the year, losing many of their group. Along came the Native Americans who showed the white man how to hunt, plant corn, and survive the new land they came to. They had a feast to celebrate and invited the Native men to join them. So began Thanksgiving, falalalala  lalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! 
      Now a days we have gatherings with people we see often and those that are the holiday people, you know the once or twice a year folks. We shop at grocery stores crowded beyond belief and stress and fret over producing a meal that looks like the one on the cover of the magazine. It's the start of the special foods, the ones we only make for these occasions. We use the excuse it's Thanksgiving so make sure you eat even more than normal. Gluttony at it's best and over the years I have come to hate this part of it. Oh I do bake & cook some special goodies, but as the years go by the sides are getting less in number. We all like the Normal Rockwell Thanksgiving, but it's not us anymore. The basics are there, and we are slowly learning to share. We are gorging on so much food, and in the next street there may be a family that barely has enough. I see more people giving money or even food to help the folks who need it. I give every year to a group that supplies meals for families, and as for us? We have a lovely dinner, that has a few sides and one dessert. We leave sated but we aren't waddling. 
      My take on this day goes as follows this year: 
Thanksgiving is a time to ponder what we are grateful for. This year as people are still struggling to get back to a normal life in the hardest hit areas of hurricane Sandy here in the US, special thoughts go out to all of those who lost homes and more so, those who lost lives of family and friends to the destruction. It was a strong reminder of what truly matters. I want to let my family and friends know how much they are loved and thought about. I am so grateful for everyone of you. You are scattered across land AND seas, but I close my eyes and you are all right there. You are all what I am Thankful for!!  
     Ciao For Now

not a whole lot

     Let's see, my mind is all over the place tonight. Like hubs was telling that old joke, "how do you get down from an elephant?" I answer "You don't get down from an elephant, you get down from a duck!" I admit when I was young that really confused me, as I had no idea what that meant. So I say this and hubs is laughing at me. lol  
     Just getting ready for work tomorrow as I am working the early shift and I'm glad since I get to leave work a little earlier than 8pm. As a matter of fact I admit I was a bit upset this morning. I had read my work email and they said that our helpdesk was going to now be closing at 6PM. I was wondering if I was going to be needed. I was told that my schedule as of Dec. 10th will now be 9 - 6. Whew!! :-D
     I'm trying to calm down all. I get too frantic sometimes, as you all know I get over the top easily and I was worked up and tried emailing. Some good things today, my friend got to go to his concert and another's dog is back home  :-D  almost finished with my tea.
     Guys I'm tired, still feeling the effects of the day spent driving on Monday methinks. So I will be back tomorrow night with Thanksgiving thoughts. So until them, Ciao For Now

Just got back from NY this afternoon.

     Well peeps I'm back. Had a marvelous time, and as always hate to leave.  I tell you, the more I see my friends the more it hurts to leave. I even skyped and face timed with some (one friends dogs decided to take Center camera until her hubby got the lol).  I just got a text that another pal, well she just downloaded Skype. Love it, this way we can open a bottle of wine and share it over the computer and talk boys and shoes  HAHAHA
     Saturday was a cool night, the gals came by and we ate and laughed. Found this cheap wine that is a mix of red wine and of all things dutch chocolate. It tasted like chocolate milk or YooHoo (a Chocolate drink here in the US) And even though it was only 14% alcohol it gave me quite a buzz! Then we went to pick up one lady's hub at his job and for the life of me I could not say the word lactaid! Then I wondered if women who are lactose intolerant have issues when they breast feed.I mean it's milk right? lol
     Sunday was the girl's brunch.  Oh my!! I'm still kind of full, well not really but there was lots of food and babies this child ate!! I had a bagel that I quartered and tried 4 different cheese speads. There was a yummy swiss chard quiche and breakfast stuffed peppers, and a french toast casserole. Then desserts, nice cinnamon buns and a fabulous rum cake, pumpkin pie and crumb muffins. Two cups of tea and I rolled out after about 4 hours.  Met a friend of a friend, who as par for the facebook course, I felt like I knew her forever.  She was just lovely, looking forward to seeing her again. 
     So funny talking about food. It was brought to my attention that us Americans do that a lot, and we do indeed. That is something I do try to curb now that I'm aware but it's hard to do LOL  I went to the grocery store at least 3x this weekend. Da kept asking if I needed cash, he shows me his wallet and he has all 20's. I asked him if he got a job as a gigolo. He laughed then said no but he did have a date this week with his lady friend. He made it a point to say she came back to the house and stayed for almost 2 hours. I looked at him with wide eyes and asked him "Daddy, is she going to be my new mommy?" bwahahahaha    It was a very enjoyable weekend except right as I was leaving, I set up the dishwasher and hit the button and - NOTHING!! It's broken :-(  So thinking I know what I'm getting dad for Christmas. 
      Well peeps that was the weekend in a nutshell, hope you had a good one. Back to the grind for me tomorrow.  So as always Ciao For Now
      

Friends Here, Friends There, Even A Friend In The Sky

     Well peeps, got to my Dad's okay and saw very little of the devastating damage from the hurricane, save huge piles of cut up trees. But it was dark and one weird look was driving past Coney Island. You could see shadow play of the iconic rides against the sky. Spooky looking without the lights on! You looked quickly down the street but its too dark to see anything really. The gas situation has eased up so I may explore a little tomorrow.
     Like I said at my Da and we had a nice cup of tea, as he told me about his date. They were at the restaurant over 2 hours then here at the house for another 2. He said they talked and laughed. I go the impression they had a make out session lol. I teased him saying. Dad am I gonna have a new mommy? He laughed and said noooo!  I think I may need to have "The Talk" with him soon! Hehehe
     Now the air part! A friend of mine is flying tomorrow and I wish him a safe flight and a wonderful trip!!well I am going to bed. It's almost quarter to 3 in the morning and Dad sounds revalie at. 0900 hours lol. So ciao for now
   

Lovin' My Quickies ;-)

     Well it is done. Open enrollment is over, 4 weeks of crazy!! If you haven't read my last few blogs please do so. I am tired and I am going to bed. Have a cup of tea at my side and I am decompressing. I will be at work Friday at 8AM so I get the joy of seeing all the people who did not elect benefits call and complain that they had to wait a long time on the phone this week. Of course doesn't matter that they had 3 weeks before that to call in ;-) 
    I am heading to NY tomorrow night for 3 days, returning on Monday. Seeing some gal pals of mine and hangin' at my Dad's then a brunch on Sunday. Possible breakfast with another pal Sunday morning early, thats not certain though. Come back on Monday, work for 2 days then off for Thanksgiving holiday for a 4 day long weekend.  YAY  Looking forward to seeing my in-laws at Thanksgiving. Had a great chat with my bro in law tonight and my niece. Today she turned 11 and was telling me things she has been up to. Very impressed to hear all of it, and she sews now, even made her own nightgowns, I can't wait to see her creations :-) 
    Okay mates (hehe), I'm out so until next time, Ciao For Now

Read The one below. This is just a thought

Holy crap!! Hubs and I ate a little air popped popcorn and I moved and a popcorn hull was stuck under my right tit!  How it got there I have not a clue. Lmao

Crazy Day

     Stick a fork in me I AM DONE!!! It's only 6:40 PM and we have already taken over 1500 calls today. This morning we had 87 calls in cue!! Tomorrow is the last day, so of course everyone waited to enroll and ask questions then get angry that they have to wait upwards of an hour until they get through.  I got so busy that myself and the other supervisor were taking phone calls. Like the old days. I haven't been on the phones for almost 2 years and I actually forgot how to log in! HAHAHA  One of the calls I took was over an hour long, I was ready to scream when we got through!! If you have so many questions and issues, why are you calling the day before it closes when you had 4 weeks to make your choices. Oh it was funny, I had to call an employee back to let him know his issue was fixed and he didnt pick up, I asked for him, and I heard in the distance someone yelling for him to come to the phone that there was a sexy sounding woman calling for him.  BWAHAHAAHAHA. I hate my voice, so it always sounds odd to me when someone says it. Then again I used to work at a sex hotline taking "Those" kind of calls. Although I don't think my voice mattered as much as what I was saying. What can I say I have a great imagination & give good phone - whoot whoot!  LMAO
     We still have 20 calls in cue now, and we close at 8PM. Told hubs bring food home for himself, as I am not sure what time I will be leaving tonight. It's been a brutal open enrollment this year as all 60K+ employees must go in. I had a slice of pizza today that is it, several cups of tea as well and none of that is sitting well. My manager has yogurt that I can have and I may take her up on that as I am not going to eat at 9PM because I will be crashing as soon as I get home!!
    I will say though peeps I am feeling mentally more like myself, physically I am still under par. I look tired and I have to monitor my breathing still. But, knock wood, it also seems to be improving. I have been using the inhaler they gave me
every morning and night and I am not gasping for air at night anymore, so this is good news. I don't enjoy being sick. Hubs is sick now and several freinds are and everyone at work is hacking and sneezing so I guess it was inevitable.  The mental part though is good, as the song says "I get by with a little help from my friends" I am so looking forward to seeing some of them this weekend.  I'm trying guys i really am!!!
    Speaking of friends, one of them found out that she was laid off. I feel so bad for her. She is a great lady and doesn't deserve the crap she's getting. I wish I could help her more than just being the ear but I will help anyway I can. Another friend is going to Hong Kong on business and I know he will have a great time. I'm very happy for him as I know he's wanted to go now for several years. I can't wait to go to England and i will finally have a passport. I have never been outside of the United States other than Mexico, when I was in California but that is just showing your drivers license. Well was all those years ago. It was a blast too, lots of tequilla, good street food, music playing at the cafe and cheesy tourist things. I loved it!! I want to travel the globe and NOT the theater. Take that back, I want to go there too!! I would love to see a play there. Midsummers Night Dream or Twelth Night, my two favorite plays by Shakespeare. Bet you thought I'd say Macbeth, witch that I am ;-)  lol
    Dare I jinx it? It looks like our cue is now in single digits, not for long I'm sure. I have written the calories for my slice of pizza and I am way below what I should have and there was a carb crust. Its not many calories but as always for me it's the carbs. I spent the night writing down my shopping list for work next week. I need to start eating dinner here again, as eating too late is not great either if you go to sleep right after or shortly after. I promised my friend that I will be able to keep up exploring all the places he is going to take me in England, and I'm sure his girls will keep me on my toes as well. LOL I must be up to snuff, hell I promised!!
    Well peeps I am going now, and am grateful for the employees who have been working through lunch and working late, they rock!! I mean our average daily phone calls this week have been about 1500 to 1700 calls a day!!! woof!! lmao
So as always I am ending with Ciao For Now

An added quickie.

     For the first time in about a week I am going to sleep with a lighter heart and a smile on my lips! It's a great feeling. :-D

Life Goes On Yet Again

     Well I am going into work tonight from 5 to 8PM, as long as I don't move too much my breathing is not too bad. Oh joy!! I spoke to a few of you and you all said the same thing, I must take care of me, and you all are right. I said the same thing to someone today, I should listen to my own voice. it felt nice speaking to you guys and I know I've been so erratic, you grounded me. Voices of reason speaking! I know what I must do and damn it i'm going to do it. I have a lot to offer and I'm going to focus on that!!! 
   Good news though I was talking with a friend who comes down this way from NY a lot and he told me that the drive was reasonably uneventful as the roads are all clear. I was concerned as to what damage hurricane Sandy may have caused. So sad when you see all the photos. I have donated $ as from down here that's what I could do.
     Just wanted to say hello and hope you all have a great evening. I will write more tomorrow as its almost 8:30 and I want to get home. lol So until that time Ciao For Now

Early Post Tonight - Better

     Well a co-pay, a chest x-ray and and an inhaler later I am home, after having gone to the doctor's. My fever was high and he gave me anti biotics called a Z pack - big ole horse pills that are supposed to knock whatever is in you out fast!! Only 5 of them too. He gave me an inhaler and its working a bit as I'm breathing better but he did tell me if it doesn't get better he wants me to go to the hospital for a CT Scan. Oh boy!! That unnerves me as I had a blood clot back in 1980. Not fun I can tell you. They had to take blood every 4 hours from a live artery, not a vein and I am not looking forward to maybe having to do that again. Hoping for the best. 
     Still not where I want to be right now. I want to speak to a few friends that I need to know all is okay but I really need to meditate and try to ground and center my own self. After all if you are not yourself no one but you can really help you get there but fuck it hurts to look around and all I see is my cat starring at me like I'm crazy. Maybe she is right. LMAO
     I really am so lucky that my manager is a wonderful lady, I was so upset when I called her this morning. The timing at work is bad as this is the last 4 days of open enrollment but I was told to relax and take care of me. Trying to everyone.  I'm better than yesterday, bit better than this morning, I'm stubborn so I want to be better as soon as possible. I promise a more lighthearted blog coming up very soon. Oh FYI I kind of kicked myself as I listened to Christmas music today hehehe  made me feel good. I want to make you all feel good and hopefully that will be soon!!
    Thank you all for reading and as always Ciao For Now

Not quite an Apology

     Lately I've been having some personal issues and I'm feeling very lost. I have been a fucking roller coaster of emotions because if this! I saw some things Friday that made me realize I get clingy, too clingy. It's only because I miss people yet I'm so afraid of losing them I push too hard and make it worse. I have always tried to be there for my friends, my phone is always on, but I don't want to bother them with my problems. So what do I do? I make a pest if myself instead of saying I need to talk, I need to know you care! Not normally this needy a person but when things happen that you keep to yourself you get needy but no one knows why so you just seem like an idiot!  I will get through this I know  but I'm tired of doing this alone! I need my friends and you all are so very far away! I want to say so much but I just get it jumbled. So I'm sorry to be this way, what I really need is to crawl into a friends arms and just have a good cry. Sounds childish, especially to those who don't get this way   Yes I AM strong normally but right now not so much!

Weekend

    Lets see, an epiphany of sorts Friday  night, realizing that as time passes things indeed change, and if you look you see it is the natural way. I just realized I put pressure on people that I shouldn't and they, bring friends are gracious about it!
     It's been a less than stellar weekend, I have been ill and that's just the start. Not going into detail peeps, lets just say I am looking forward to next weekend and want to put all this one , sans my epiphany, away!
     I am tired and its only 8:30 in the evening. Think I will have some tea and call it a night. So ciao for now all

Thanksgiving Is Coming (Nom Nom)

     Hey Everyone, in 2 weeks us here in America and maybe Canada, will be celebrating Thanksgiving. When we celebrate a group of frigid religious male & female zealots by stuffing our face with way too much food and US football. Praise the Lord (& pass the ammunition)  

     For me it has always been a time for family, that is what I am grateful for, perhaps it means so much to me since my immediate family is so small. I am an only child and Nana lived with us so if it was just us we had 4 at the table. For holidays though if all the relatives came over it could go up to over 20 LOL I recently found my Mother's stuffing recipe in an old box in Dad's closet. I am going to make it this year. Mom would put half inside the turkey and then just bake the rest in a pan, that was the best as it got all crispy on top and soft in the center. We have been going to my in-laws for many years and i want to help cook this year. My brother in law makes a great turkey and gravy, and last year my sister in law made this "stuffing" that was just fabulous. This holiday centers around food and I try to get away from that but we always end up at the table don't we. Well tis the start of the season of eating LOL  We also continue to show our thanks for all we have by getting up at 2am on what is known as Black Friday. We can get an extra 50% off if we arrive early. I did this once and ONLY once as I couldn't sleep. I admit i got some grat deals and got many folks their Christmas gifts  but I felt like crap the next day so I wil never do that again. I am doing all my shopping either online or local shops. Try to support the small store owners. I have found some of the coolest thimngs in stores like that and they are not mass produced so you wont see your gift in every home.  I love to bake and often give baskets of cakes and cookies I've made to friends.  I also make bath items like scrubs and lip balms.

     One thing I am going to try this Thanksgicing is a drink I found on these blogs. The blog is The Cocktail Lady, she has some great things on her blog, lots of good recipes and she is doing a drink a day and this one sounds great - She calls it a "Kinky Thanksgiving" Of course i noticed the name hahahaha :-D   Here is the recipe and picture: (all credit goes to her)

• 2 oz Kinky
• 2 oz cranberry cocktail juice
• 1 oz apple juice

In a tall cocktail glass filled 3/4 with crushed ice, pour in all three of your ingredients.  Stir well and enjoy!

     What is this kinky vodka all about? Well I looked it up and its a mix of passion fruit, blood orange and mango vodka. Sounds yummy and this drink sounds so refreshing. They have a website and an entire bunch of Kinky recipes, you know with that name I'm checking them out  (Me so naughty - and damn proud to say it!! ;-D)

     Thing is that I want to get away from centering everything around food. I am bringing Pictionary and Cranium with me to Thanksgiving so we can play games and not just sit around a dinner table. Food is a wonderful way to share good times but it is not the only way...there is also just talking, having a few drinks, playing games, etc. This Thanksiving this is what I'm striving for.  I will let you know what actually happens.

So until next time I will say Ciao For Now

      

 

The Day After

     Well day one peeps, I'm sure by now you all know who won the Presidential Race, Obama stays in the White House. It's funny, a guy on my facebook page was posting all day for Romney but not one post today. Look no matter who had ended up winning, I would pray to all the Gods that their minds are made to choose the right things for us. I think things may actually improve in a few years time, I hope so. It's a job I would not want.
     Okay the latest from your weather center in lovely downtown Virginia, reporting about...what else? NEW YORK.  I could not believe when I saw the report for my dad tonight. Snow!!! A good amount of it too.  I called him and told him to get extra blankets out just in case. There is a group on facebook dedicated to my hometown. Now my Mom & Dad moved there about 50 years ago, so my dad is one of those guys you see all the time. I got so many people on there saying they would be more than happy to look in on him and make sure he is okay. I know most of them from the neighborhood and some I went to school with. It was so touching that people would do this for me, I did nothing to deserve it yet the offers were there, and heart felt. I could have cried I was that touched.  There is a concert to help Brooklyn and The Rockaways recover from hurricane Sandy. I can't be there of course but I did send a donation. It's going to take some time.
     Work has been good and I am walking around better, still not 100% but much better, the sciatica is settling down. I have a few things to mention but I took some cold meds and I'm starting to get that cuddly warm feeling LOL so cutting this almost as short as me, {snort} I will say Ciao For Now
     
    

The Die Is Cast, We Shall See

     To quote a co-worker, "I have never been more aware or afraid of an election."  This election is going to be close and it more than likely will take a few days to come to the actual totals and the final winner. I personally am afraid because I do not look good in small aprons or wearing my hair up. I actually want to make the same as my counter supervisor (male) but I may not get that chance anymore. I am in a diminishing middle class, the rich are getting tax cuts that I will never see.  I fear for everyone. Not saying the other candidate is just golden, oh no, but to me he is the lesser of the two evils. My own father who is a registered Conservative does not like MITTens at all, and dad even voted for Bush but ended up regretting that choice and said so. My Dad married, moved out to the "Suburbs" worked two jobs when I was little, then my Mom worked as well, and together they raised me and made a home, I went to a prep school. We were what was then called "upper" Middle Class. This moniker is no longer valid, I am worried that Middle Class will go by way of the DODO.  I pay into social security every check, but by the time I will get it it may not even be there. I see people who do nothing but have babies they can't afford, refuse jobs, get relief checks, drive new cars, and have designer purses. My car is over 5 years old, and hubs and I put aside the new kitchen I so desperately want because we just can't afford 8K walking out the door as we are not selling our home for at least another 2 years. Okay I do have several designer purses! LMAO We are not perfect by any stretch but I think if MITTens get in we are headed for a nose dive into hard ground! I hope that he can prove me wrong, I will admit it, BUT I don't think I will have to. I think it will be more like telling all the folks who voted for him I TOLD YOU SO, as he's done nothing, he's terrible. One friend of mine is gay and he adores MITTens, no clue what drugs he takes but I want him to share. Look we dont't know and probably wont for about a week (my guess) I really need to get my passport now!!!
     Oh peeps that is all the big news here in America right now, and I know you all have opinions as we look terrible to most of the world, we are young, we have the attitude of a teenager, and like a teenager, I think we don't think things all the way through. I want to believe our heart is still filled with good thoughts and hopefully one day someone will come forward, and fan our dying embers into a bright fire once again. Until then, we wait.   
     I am not a politician, I am not a political major at the University, I am just a woman who wants to get treated fairly, paid equal for what I do, live comfortably, there is enough for all of us if people stopped being so fucking greedy!! We could all drive Mercs, wait is that Communism? LOL  Well on paper it sounds great, but then lots of things do. The Rise And Fall Of The Third Reich was a interesting book written on paper but I wouldn't want to live it now! Maybe I'm just silly and dumb on all this, I just don't know sometimes. So if what I said made no sense to anyone, as I can ramble on, pardon me :-D  I am shutting down for the night here at work so I will say until next time, Ciao For Now.

Braunschweiger

     Odd title, I know! It's what hubs wanted for dinner he said. So after work I went to the store to get him some, along with whole wheat sandwich thins (100 calorie bread), onions and hearty style mustard. All he was missing was beer (we are out). I don't remember the last time we ate this, 5-10 years ago maybe. It's so rich, and devilishly not good for you :-D  I've liked it since I was a kid. I like chopped liver & pate too! LOL What was nice, was that just picking him up something special like that had him really enjoy his meal, smiling the whole time he was eating. I didn't make it but I made him smile serving it. I like making other people smile. It makes me smile :-D
     I HEARD FROM MY DAD THIS MORNING!! YAY He got his electric back today, so he went a week with no power.He called as I was getting ready to go to work. He said how nice everyone was. His handyman, who will be painting soon, well him and his wife came by a few mornings, with muffins and coffee, they also cooked for him as did our neighbors. It was a relief to hear his voice and a joy to hear how many people thought of him. He's a pretty cool guy! 
     Okay folks, here in America we have a vote tomorrow for our next president. I'm concerned, as they say it is a close race. Who am I voting for? Not telling, and I'll tell ya what happens next we meet.
     My apologies peeps, I know my blogs have been short, but I have been busy at work that makes me weary at night and I've been running a 99.5 fever for three days. So as my pillow calls my name, I must answer. So until next time Ciao For Now   HEY
    A friend of mine just posted this on as a comment. So sad the devistation Hurricane Sandy did to us here on our east coast. Now my friend is on Long Island, I mentioned we went to Long Beach this summer and watched the vollyball game, this is it now
I am sorry to describe the destruction we've had here. Long Beach, the boardwalk we walked on this summer, the restaurant we ate at, all devastated. There is still no power and no timeline for restoration. Gas is nonexistant. I parked my car the Friday before the storm and have moved it once since. I still haven't heard from some that I've tried to reach.

Please keep them all in your thoughts everyone. Thank you

Well Here Comes Monday Again

    I am sitting here in a warm home, with electricity, and my car has gasoline in the tank, and I can get to work with no issues. Yet some of the people I know have none or only a few of these things right now. I was talking to a friend last night and he spent 45 minutes in a gas line. Thing is I am wondering how my dad is doing. I have no way to get in touch with him. I know that our neighbors are watching over him but I really want to speak with him myself. I am sure they said to him come stay but he's home I know. He's not young and he's so thin, I don't want him catching cold. I see photos of my beloved city with so much damage, the beaches that I love are so damaged, a few have pretty much been breached. I can't remember a time I have ever seen NY like this. I know it will eventually come to pass but I sure hope its sooner than later. 
    Ah the latest groovy work thing I found out Friday night was that they got rid of our night cleaning crew. Seriously??!! I went into work today and there was coffee in all the pots, and the trash was starting to get really stinky! So I emptied my trash can and my friends in the big bin in the kitchen. I then proceeded to empty and wash the coffee pots. I felt bad for the people who start early and are used to having clean pots when they come in. Reason is because we never got notice about this, I only found out because the facilities guy walked me out of the building Friday night. I really can't believe they did that. I swear!! I know the help desk doesn't make money as the business units pay to use us but come on? I think that's now a health issue, the bathroom needs to be cleaned and the day man only works 30 hours or so a week and it's not fair to him either. I can take care of my trash can but I am not cleaning personal things from the ladies bathroom, ewww!!!
     I am attempting to go back to the gym this week. My back has been so against me in this. I do exercises at night, but it's not like a gym. I need to get my new Air Walks broken in :-D 
     Little blog tonight as hubs as fallen asleep on me and it's hard to type  LOL So until I get back here I will say Ciao For Now :-D