WHY Do I Always Do This?!

     It's an age old question and I don't know if I'm just seeing it as more than what it is. I talk to folks and then I tease in a non speaking manner like a IM or txt what have you then they respond and I say something that in my head that sounds witty but after I hit send it sounds horid. Then I call to explain and its even lamer than before then I dont speak to the person so I send emails until I even annoy myself!! WTF Mary?? I know the person is busy doing what they do in life. Like live it!! They way they did years before they knew of me and will do for years and years from now as well.  I know this because I do the same - but there is this gremlin inside that occasionally pushes out and acts a fool! I PISS MYSELF OFF SO MUCH!!! I guess it stems from always wanting to be understood because lots of times over the years this was not the case. Lots of things were assumed about me and I had to say things over and over so people could understand so I suppose I could chalk it up to this , but how to get others to understand.  I will just let it go and know in my heart that I am secure in my relationships :-)
     Well the good news is that Spring is here and the weather is still holding up its end of the deal. Its now almost 6:30PM and its 72 degrees outside. There was some rain overnight (remeber the lightning I saw) but although the morning looked like there would be more nothing came of it and its been great all day.
     Work was better today and getting lots done as I have only one more day left then its a whirlwind of yardwork and clearing out debris. I rented a U-Haul moving truck so we can bring all this trash to the dump as well as bring Hub's motorcycle to his brother's house.
     Well I have to go to the doctors tomorrow as well to have him look at my leg. The last few days there is a lump on the side of my shine on the side by my owl tattoo. It was really red the other day and hot so I have been taking aspirin but this lump is quite odd and I want to get it looked at. Its not really visable but you can feel it and its hard! I am sure it has something to do with the dryness of the skin on my foot but really, I mean come on. I didn't have these issue 55 pounds heavier. Why is it I lose weight to get more fit and I get these issues now and not before.  A lady at my gym to whom I was speaking this mornign told mw that my body is changing so things that may not have come up before are coming up now.  That's not possible is it?  Oh well , as long as it levels out by the time I'm done. It is worth it.  I will write tomorrow night about my Equinox working. Not enough time right now. So until next time peeps I wish you all a good night and Ciao For Now  :-)