Mirror Mirror On The Wall...

...what the F*^K happened?????  (LOL) I have come to love that line.  It seems so obvious as we get a bit older. The lines come around eyes and things sag a bit, okay a lot!! I like looking at a person age 35 or older and seeing the tiny lines around the eyes. That to me shows me they smile. It's interesting to see people who when in their teens are skinny things then you see them grown and they have filled out, some of us filled out a bit too much. I am such an overachiever in this! :-D  Acceptance of who we are and how we look is important because you must be true to your nature. To go against it only causes more problems. Now of course if it's your nature to rob, steal or do even worse then you have issues that obviously need attending to.  
     My nature is not a skinny miss , never in my life have I ever been a skinny miss anything. When one looks to my shoulders where they actually start they are not small they are at least a medium width so I was always meant to be on the higher side of my weight range and that's fine with me. I was always active so the weight stayed decent until I got my car. Then I got lazy. In highschool I was mainly a size 14 then up to a 16/18. Still had a waist and still had a figure that got looked at in approving ways and I have recently had more than one occurance of these looks again. The first happened a little while back in a grocery store when I got chatted up.  This felt great and then of course you read the blog where the lumox called me names and upset me. Since then I have been working on me and not giving in sans a few digestive biscuits over the weekend. The other day I was driving home from work and had the top down groovin' to my music. A car pulled next to me and I glanced over, the guy driving, (late 30's I would say) said "Lookin' Good!" I smiled and said yea I love my car in this weather. He then said that he wasn't talking about the car. I smiled and said awe thank you. He said I was "Adorable"  LMAO  adorable, wow, that took me aback a bit. I told him he really should wear his glasses when he drove and he laughed and replied "I calls them as I sees them!"  The light turned green and I said have a great night and off I drove, and I admit I felt great. I know it's girly but I liked what had just happened. Nothing was going to come of it but it was nice to hear and and he was a good looking guy himself. I know what you are thinking. Why shouldn't an attractive man think I am attractive as well?  I'm sure there are those that do and I don't even know it but it was nice.... just really nice to hear one of them say it. I am human and yes I admire a pretty face but then again I firmly believe that everyone has something beautiful in them so I rarely care what outer looks are like in personal contacts. Beauty is indeed individual not to be judged on a grand scale but each person beautiful in their own skin. I am feeling better in my own skin and I am starting to get noticed that the weight is coming off too. One of the ladies at work called me aside to ask how much weight I lost, not am I losing (?) but how much? One of my reps today said I looked really good today, he then said I mean you look nice every day but really nice today. I asked him what he had done wrong?  hahahaha   But yes after almost 2 months I can finally feel the difference in myself. During our evacuation last week not only did I quite briskly run down the stairs but I walked the entire length of our large parking lot and I could have kept going. Mind you last year I did it for a fire drill and stopped 3x while doing so. Those of you who know me know that walking is not a forte at the moment but the treadmill has helped as has the weight loss. I repeat my mantra: fit not skinny over and over to myself. A good friend reminded me that you don't need to be one to be the other.
     I don't know what I will look like when I get to where I want to be but I am going to enjoy the getting there. I can't wait to see my friends who I haven't seen in a while to see what they think. Gradually this cocoon is changing me. I mean fuzzy catipilliars are cute yes but I can't wait to emerge as a colorful butterfly, spread my wings and just fly ...for my own self, I don't do this for acceptance because those I care about already accept me just as I am and I love them for it!! ......  Okay I know this blog followed no one thought but well that's my mind sometimes. Lots to say and just blurt out my thoughts.  Oh and I am not posting my naughty story I wrote because reading it last night I realized if someone under age read it I might get in trouble. So send me your email if you want it. I do warn you it goes way beyond an "R" rating  hehehehehe