Don't Fear The Reaper

     Ah Monday. you come like clockwork after two glorious days of no work. It was a decent weekend. Lots of yard work which was great up until the time my knee twisted again. Man I swear I hate this. I was going to go to the gym this morning but that didn't happen as my knee just didn't want to play nice. I did my excersises this AM here at home and it's feeling better. Well now I am sure you are all chomping at the bit and the results are in. I am over the 30 pounds by a pound and a half. So 31.5 pounds gone. I still really can't notice as I have lots to lose but by losing of course I'm gaining and the road is not all downhill, lots of curves and hills to climb. Will get there, just got to get me some hiking boots. I just wish I could fast forward to me at a size 16, it must be hard to those of you who don't worry about their weight but it's something that you are hit in the face with every day. I hope that it makes me a stronger person but I admit sometimes I feel very weak and the urge to say fuck it is strong and then I get scared sometimes too. Yes scared that I won't be around to do the things I want to. We all know this isn't healthy. I know you're thinking if I know it's not healthy why didn't I prevent it. Good question, but I have no answer to it. It just happens, you don't feel like it's happening either but then BOOM one day it hits you. One day you realize that you need to alter this. You have that one day lots of different times, and this is the time that I seem to be actually successful in my quest. I have to as you see I really don't want to die before it's time for me to do so. Life is so short anyway and it's time to make sure I will enjoy everything it has to offer. Sorry to be so maudlin but it happens occasionally. Hey I'm deep baby, lots of thoughts go through this head of mine, normally very upbeat but i am human and have fears as well as hopes and dreams so I'll be back later tonight as I have a very full day ahead. The office is in such disarray right now and well you know annual enrollment is in full swing and starts next week. I have errands galore today and right now I am feeling good!! So bye bye to sad thoughts and off I go to shower them away and start the day.  Oh did get my hair done Saturday and I'll leave a pic here so check it!  So until later peeps...ciao