New York New York A Hell Of A Town

     Less than 12 hours from now I shall be cruising my way up north. Visiting my dad of course and also to see my friends. Going out Friday night, Saturday night, Sunday most of the day, Monday I'm not sure if I'm staying one more day or going back south. I say that, although many of you may think I should say home. I see why you think that as I live in Virginia, but home is, and always will be New York! I really need this trip too. I'm becoming a pain in the arse with all this free time I have. I do tackle things that need doing here but I can't do a lot on my own. I'm on Facebook WAY to much. I send messages but people see them and since they have lives, or on trains, or driving, don't respond. I fully understand yet those off hours it would be nice o get a response YET they are home with families or out doing things that they can't respond. I am not there to see what's doing. Last thing I want to do is intrude on private time. My timing always sucks anyway. Except I'm never late. I am on rare occasion, I hate tardiness. Or is it sardines? Kind of look similar when you spell them out! 😉
     I have more interviews next week. I know it's only been a month but I'm already getting hell for buying the few dresses, and shoes I did.  Granted I purchased some incense that made me quite happy when it arrived today. I got lectured on it though. I spent 50 dollars on it, incense plus a burner in the shape of an owl, that's imported from Japan. Yes maybe I'm not working BUT  the clothes and shoes are for interviews and work. The owl was for me, I admit that it was a totally selfish purchase, but it was a little something that has made me smile more times tonight than I have all week. In several weeks.  I'm not buying something every day. I'm really restraining myself, even from more work clothes. I'm tired of being reminded we have to be careful.. Dammit I'm not a child, I understand perfectly. Just make me feel more like shit, why don't you? I feel guilty enough. I decided that I'm withdrawing my 401k , it's not a fortune but at least it's mine. Of course it will go towards bill, my car, my credit cards, this way I don't feel guilty if I want to get my hair done. I will get a job, then I can save gain. I will put a little into a CD also, to add to and grow once the job starts.
I am getting a new tattoo that luckily I paid for when I got my last one, otherwise I would have had to wait. I was supposed to get it in January but I had just gotten out of the hospital so no way that was happening. Thinking about it, I spent the holidays with an IV stuck in me, only to return to work to find that I was being made redundant in February. So far 2013 has been a basketful of puppies , NOT!!!
      Look I know in comparison to so many, I have nothing to complain about. I realize things could be so very worse, I pray to the Goddess for those people who have real sickness, no homes, no income at all, I pray to her for me too. I'm tired of being a hinderence, not any fun, needy, and I'd like to go one fucking week without crying! I don't blame folks for backing away, the thing is though, this time I need them. So back to New York I go. Back home. I am bringing my camera so I will have some pics to share. Supposed to be close to 60 degrees on Sunday, perfect weather  to walk around the vineyards. I am quite happy about that 😀. So I am going to say good night, wishing you all smiles and good times. There is so much positive to focus on, my apologies for harping on the negative.
Ciao For Now.