By All Accounts

     In my life I think I've lost about 160 pounds. I've been living on and off for probably 17 years. Oddly I've never gained back my original loss of 45 pounds way back in 1997, which for those of you who know me, can realize - I'm a large unit. So I've lost weight and gained some back, in doing this several times I've lost my tits mainly.  So not fair, that when I gain it back, it never goes back to them.  I must stay on track this time, if for the sake of the girls.  Like I've told my friend, they are starting to look like two empty wallets.  I've been rather sick. Got that flu like bug that so many are getting. I've gained almost 2 pounds. Had soup with crackers and not eating right.  Yesterday for the first time I made a roast. Felt good to cook. Poor hubs was playing nursemaid, now he's feeling poorly. I have cottage cheese and strawberries for my snack tomorrow, protein shake for breakfast then salad with some avocado for lunch. Dinner is leftover roast with some form of veg. Thinking brussells. Very healthy day, and as you can see, quite filling. It's coming in at about 725 calories.  My fitness pal wants me at 1200, my doctor says at least 1000 but agrees with 1200. Maybe 2 veg, I love asparagus so I may have that too. That's a sampling of food, I do sometimes crave the goodies. Especially these past few days. When I'm sick, I want comfort food. (That's if it's not intestinal) Lol.  

I'm actually a very lucky woman. I have a stent, so life has been forgiving to me, in the fact that I'm here. My stent was a surprise. My Doctor told me that if I needed one, it's in a good place, away from my heart.  It's a family thing, my mom, my uncle and my cousins all have heart issues. So why am I so stupid in the fact I let myself go? Dr said it has more to do with family history than body size. Maybe, but why tempt fate? So I'm down 57 pounds now, ( well 55 again) & have always to go but it's a fine start. So here's to us all who are watching what we eat. 

      Another issue and it kind of goes hand in hand, is I  will be needing to interview for a new job shortly.  As I mentioned a few times, I will no longer be at my company, as my position is being outsourced. So I'll be interviewing, and I really hate the little glances you get when your fat. They think you don't notice, but you do. Newsflash. I feel more comfortable interviewing with an older person to be honest. Those younger women, you know,  the ones who have ankles, tend to judge you a bit harsher. Look, I did my stint wearing 3 or 4" heels to work back in the day, now I go for the 2.5" or kitten heels when I interview.  I still look good, hair and make up in place but gods, hearing all the thanks but no thanks, it gets to you. I am taking a little time to sort myself out. Visit NYC for a solid week or little more. Do a few things in my own home that need more than a weekends attention. Of course, I am applying for unemployment. So it should be fine for a few months. But I'd like to be set in a position by summertime. So fingers crossed and all good wishes appreciated. 

     Well, it's half 10 and I'm going to go shower so all I need to do in the morning is wash my hair. I must get to work. Gave to go train my replacements. Fuckin A!! So until next time - ciao for now.