Oh dig this peeps and peepettes, that guy I told you about yesterday, emailed me back, as I told him how I felt in an email last night. He was so apologetic, told me he didn't see me as a conquest. I'm really nice, then asked what tv shows I liked, how long have I been married, things like that. Then asked if I can forgive him for assuming things. I said fine, yea sure. I'm not looking for a lover, friends though are always nice. We shall see, but there is no trust, it must be built.
Funny thing about trust. In my life I have a handful of people I do trust, with everything, nothing they don't know. Only a few I have known a long time, 2 are people I only know about 5 & 6 years, BUT, something about them made me trust them immediately. No idea why, just do, and they know they can trust me. I love to gossip, who doesn't, but I know what to say and what not to say. I can keep a secret really well, and won't steal anyone's thunder. Just not cool to do.
I'm sitting here enjoying my tea, and my candle is giving off a nice glow and smells wonderful. It's apple scented by Yankee Candle. I need a new one soon, as this one is 2/3rds gone. Every night when I light my candle, I say a prayer for friends who may need them. Things like health issues, or stress or sick family. I burn my incense also but tonight it's jut the candle. I love to watch the flame wiggle around, it's a smaller version of a fireplace. Which I use to help meditate. Staring at the flames, slows heart rate down, and calms you. It's like watching a glowing modern dance. You can get lost in it. Oh I must share this. One time (at band camp BWAHAHA) I was on a retreat in my sophomore year of high school. We were all the way out on Long Island, more on that after the story. One night we were in the great room all 18 of us. We were going to do a group meditation. So they crimped plastic wrap into a long rope attached by wire to the ceiling. We got into comfortable positions on the huge cushions placed on the floor. They played this amazing zen like music and then lit the bottom of this "rope" (water in a pan underneath of course) well the room was so beautifully lit up from the flames. We all watched as they burned in a rainbow of colors because of the plastic. We were mesmerized for sure, so relaxed that it took a few moments to realize the flames did not stop at the wire but started up that and caught the ceiling on fire. The counselor, who obviously shared our mindset, jumped up and quickly put out the fire. So smoothly, that my thought was she was ready for it. Funny now, but could have been bad. This retreat house was owned by the Franciscan Brotherhood. Very cool place. Looked like it belonged in England. It actually had hidden walkways to sneak from room to room. I had a great weekend. Obviously it was a catholic school but by the time I went I was very interested in Wicca so being outdoors was awesome. A place to get in touch with the Goddess in me. Those trees, the animals in the woods, that spoke more to me than any church sermon. It wasn't until college and a retreat to Montauk Point, that I knew Catholic religion was not my path, but Wicca was. I remember the priest on that retreat with us, held a communion, one girl was hesitant to take the bread that was offered because she was Jewish. He told her to go ahead and take some, she was not going to be damned. That this was the time for sharing, sharing of yourself with others. I spoke to him later that day, and told him my feelings about the whole thing. He told me to follow my heart, that I can choose whatever religion I want, or none at all. That some of the best people he knew never stepped inside a church. I was amazed that he didn't scold me, but understood what I was saying. The room we were in, was the one where we started each day (really early to see sunrise YAWN REALLY EARLY LOL), and it had this floor to ceiling window, well it seemed like it, it faced east. We looked out at the ocean and he said that's the best church there is. I remember feeling very lucky to know him, I respected him very much. He was secure enough in his belief, that he could accept others as well. WOW, where did all this come from, just kind of flowed out of me. Well I guess it happens that way sometimes. :-D
I am wide awake and just made another cuppa. I woke up early but then fell asleep until almost half eleven. So of course I'm not tired. I have been thinking of this coming Sunday and what to bring to brunch. I'm thinking Victoria sponge, it's a cake filled with fruit and creme...YUM Sponges are easy to make. I may ask my sister in law if I can make it in their kitchen so I can just leave it there. I don't have room in my fridge and it needs to be refrigerated. I need to see if there is anything else we should bring. I got the kids cute baskets, for my nephew I got one that has footballs, soccer balls, baseballs, and basket balls over it, my niece's has, flowers and a boa like edging. Feminine like she is.
I think it's a Netflix kind of night, with headphones of course LOL So many things to watch. Think I'll go for an old time B&W movie with Hepburn or Stewart, Cagney or Grant, don't you love old movies? So with that choice I will say Ciao For Now
No comments:
Post a Comment