Yes AND No

     Well today I had my first physical interview. I was a bit nervous I admit, it's been a long time since I had to interview. It went well and I had a nice talk with the lady at the agency. I am going back on Friday as she wants me to do some tests on Word, etc.  (Practice all day tomorrow LOL)   I also got another rejection notice, but it came later this afternoon and I had already comes to term with many things, so I handled it much better than my first one.
     Oh peeps let me tell you, last night I had a breakdown, tried and true get the men in the white coats. I just started to cry, I mean I was sobbing, my poor husband was just sitting next to me looking at me like a flag or something would pop up to explain why I was crying so hard. He asked me what was wrong and I couldn't even get words out. This lasted about 15 minutes and when I finally caught my breath I just said that I felt like a failure. I couldn't find a job, I was eating badly and not going to the gym like I should. He told me I needed to calm down, but he didn't get it. He's not going through any of this.  he made me a cup of tea and I calmed down and was able to get a grasp on the situation.  Really poor man wanted to help me, but I leaned into him and drank my tea. Him just holding me felt good and helped to calm me a lot. To me it really steamed from not eating as I should.  During the night, I was getting the worst pains in my sides. To the point that I pretty much woke up almost every hour. Felt better after a hot shower this morning. We need a new bed in the worst way and I know this is part of the reason for the aches.  Well this morning I was able to out into words my feelings on another site. A friend wrote to me to let me know a little on complex carbs and basically told me its okay, that we all falter & it's okay to slip. It made me feel better and then another lady wrote me that she can understand what I was going through.  I know I am not special with this but it surprised even me at how I broke down. Thank the gods for family and friends. 
     To look at this room it seems so normal. Cat is sleeping on my bunched up blanket. Hubs is on his Ipad playing Candy Crush Saga and I am here on the laptop, the TV is on in the background. Tea is next to me on my night table, it's Lady Grey from Twinings. A gift that I am savoring. Yep pretty basic night. Not very exciting but after my craziness last night, I want a little boring. 
     Oh it's pretty much past, crisis averted. I am gym bound tomorrow and ready to sweat. I have an appointment with a trainer again for Saturday. I was back on track eating today so I was very happy with that. I really am a very fun,  I'm just off kilter. It's odd, I've always thought myself a go with the flow kind of gal and I am but I like a solid base under it I guess LOL  
    I need a night of wild dancing and some alcohol  hahaha and a few of my gal pals here are wanting the same so all I can say is look out PA.  I may get me a shiny new blouse to wear on the dance floor...woohoo!!  So true how things can change, night and day on how I felt this morning to the way I feel now. We all have ups and downs, we have moods and thank you for letting me vent it to you all.  So tomorrow I will post having been all sweaty from a great work out :-D  Ciao For Now